While I was in the States, one friend asked me to summarize my first year in Korea in 4 words. My first word was "wow", partially because of my poor ability to be concise, but also due to the fact that 2009 was a year of brand new experiences: being in Korea for the first time, being a foreigner for the first time, and being in church planting ministry for the first time. It is hard to step back and truly appreciate and marvel at the uniqueness of this year, since I am right in the middle of it. On occasion, it will hit me, "Jon, you are half a world away from anything you've ever known. Jon, you are surrounded by Koreans. Jon, you are helping to plant a church. Jon, you are even preaching." Bizarre. One day I am sure I will be able to marvel at the experiences I have had at such a young age.
The next three words I chose were "Humility. Broken Expectations." These words are inseparably linked. Humility came though God breaking my own expectations for ministry. Though I would not have verbalized it, I came to Korea with the foolish notion that I could be something in ministry. I could quickly have great conversations with Koreans, teach in a way that would resonate with my students, and leave Korea a totally different person. I do not like to admit this, but that was my initial vision for this ministry. Thankfully, God intervened. After first arriving in Korea, I was told that by merely going into a coffee shop, reading a book, and just being there, Koreans would come over to me and have conversations. In my second full week in Korea, all the Yoo family caught the flu, and I went to do this on a few different occasions. Almost no conversations were had. Nothing of significance to report back to Jae. The only conversation I did have, the Korean I talked to thought I was a mormon. Ministry was not nearly as thrilling as I had envisioned. In the midst of my doubts, God desired to show me that it is only when He opens doors that ministry is possible. Sitting on the subway after trying to connect people in a coffee shop, I had given up for the day. I was going home to rest after another unsuccessful, frustrating day. Yet, as I sat on the subway with no intention of talking, another Korean asked me who I was and what I was doing in Korea. This Korean and two of her friends have been in our church ever since. On another occasion, I was in route to an English church with the Yoo's. Walking with a Korean/English bible in my hand, a canadian named Chris tapped me on the shoulder to ask where I was going. After the service ended, he invited me to a bible study he had started with several other guys. When we began our church, nearly everyone from this bible study joined our body as well as many other people Chris new (nearly 20 people). I was not trying to connect anyone. None of these people came through my efforts. God solely opened these doors. I began to see that ministry is not about my efforts and work. Instead, it is all of God's grace to provide ministry opportunities, usually when I least expect it. I can spend hour after hour, labor with all the energy and strength I have; yet, all of it is vanity apart from God going before me.
When I thought of ministry before coming to Korea, I thought of purely exciting work: day-to-day, heartfelt conversations with Koreans, soul-stirring classes and bible studies where Koreans could really grasp the gospel (through my teaching, of course), connecting many Koreans to our ministry through being a foreigner, and having wonderful relationships with most everyone in the church. Instead, I spent much of my time in the first year making bulletins, printing songs for services, cleaning our office, struggling to connect with Koreans, typing up agendas for different meetings, passing our fliers for our church, and doing lots of different administrative work. Ministry was far more normal, humble, and similar to life than I had hoped. Instead of being fulfilled and doing remarkable things for God, I was being humbled and exposed for my selfish, false expectations. Rather than doing work where I could share a great number of incredible, missionary stories, God desired for me to do humbling, often unnoticed work. Feeling insignificant, I was brought to see that I was making ministry all about me. In the first sermon I preached on a Sunday morning this fall, I was reminded what I was missing in ministry through the example of Jesus washing His disciples' feet. At the end of his life, on his way to the most miserable death in history, Jesus found it utterly necessary to do the work of a slave, work that no one in Jewish culture would have desired to do. Yet, Jesus, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the one who upholds the universe by the word of His power (as one person said, His pinky), condescended to wash His disciples feet. This was not just a one-time occurrence; it was merely an extension of all Jesus' ministry. Everything Jesus did was the work of a humble servant that often was unnoticed. In fact, nearly all that Jesus did in His life was not understood, appreciated, or grasped in its significance and sacrificial love. Instead, Jesus was despised for becoming a man, rejected for His life of self-giving love, and forsaken by all for what was the greatest act of love every displayed in giving His life for all sinners who would believe in Him. A servant is not greater than his master, and humbling work is not to be the exception, but the norm for the believer. Ministry does not have to do with me looking or feeling significant but everything to do with reflecting Jesus through humble service.
As a new year is dawning, it is tempting for me and our staff in the church to see this first year of humbling learning experiences as merely the backdrop for the ministry that is taking place this year. Many different Koreans are beginning to come into our body. Opportunities abound in regard to me starting a small group, bible study, and getting involved in Koreans' lives. Every week unbelievers and nominal Christians are getting to hear the gospel. God is definitely doing some incredible things. Yet, the lessons our staff and I learned about ministry in 2009 are invaluable. Without them, we would not know what ministry is. Before we could give the gospel to others, we had to learn to believe it ourselves in the face of adversity and brokenness. Praise God that He loves us enough to give us what we need, not what we want.
I am very excited to share the coming year with you. It will be far different than what I expect, which I'm learning is a wonderful blessing. As we all venture into a new year, I want to leave you with this benediction from Paul that reminds us how God transcends all mine and your expectations for our ultimate good in Christ: "Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen" (Ephesians 3:20-21).
